i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
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