Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
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