So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
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