You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
