Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
Randomize