I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
from now on my penis is your penis
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
