I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Randomize
