You made me cry and you don't even care
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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