whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
I think pants incapable of making pants work
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize
