you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
It's rum buckets o'clock
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
Randomize
