Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
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