do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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