I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
Randomize