They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
