I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
