Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
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