Well apparently he's into motor boating.
I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
remember when u banged some random dude twice in the back restaurant room of the bar i work at with customers still there? and woke up with an enormous highschool-sized hickey this morning? no big deal.
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Someone came in the potted fern
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
Randomize
