You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
Randomize
