He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
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