I just poured my flask into a drink. Then I realized the drink belonged to the guy next to me so I stole it from him. He confronted me and I made out with him to distract him. When I looked up, I realized his wife was watching. Its barely 10:00.
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
Randomize
