Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize