Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
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