that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
Randomize