You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
Randomize
