if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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