so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Randomize
