This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize