Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
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if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
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She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
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