PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
25 Odd Things These Pathetic People Do For Enjoyment
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
The Most Iconic Met Gala Looks The Kardashian’s Have Rocked
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.