doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
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