Having a random hookup so left but love u
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
Randomize
