another moral hangover. fuck.
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
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I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
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i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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