so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
You can't motorboat a personality
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
