I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
Randomize
