Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
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