Sponge bath it is.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
Randomize
