Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
Randomize
