did you get engaged???
Your dad touched me again.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
Who put my cat in the fridge?
Randomize
