I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
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