Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
