party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
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