SEEEEXXX PLEASE
I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
I forgot how hot balto sounded
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
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