It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
Randomize
