oh god the rape fog is back!
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
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