there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
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You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
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PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
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