I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize