Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
