she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
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