Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
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