I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
