Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
Randomize