id be glad to
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
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